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FIVE THINGS YOU SHOULD NOT DO IF YOUR DEAR ONE IS DIAGNOSED WITH BREAST CANCER 1. Don’t overplay the situation! Give it the importance it deserves and go about doing what is required to do, without hitting the panic button.Trust your doctor. His or her years of training and experience will put things into perspective which Dr Google cannot. Google only with the intent of educating yourself so that your questions are more to the point. 2. Don’t make all the decisions for her as if she don’t exist. Keep her in the loop.Remember it is about her and she has every right to be part of every decision that will impact her life. Don’t choose breast removal over breast conservation, because you think it is best for her. If her surgeon thinks it is safe to conserve the breast, encourage her to make that decision. Her feminity does matter to her. 3. Don’t over pamper. You never did that before and she is used to that muted pampering . This over pampering can throw her off guard and unable to cope with, especially when she has this ‘hyped’ disease to deal with. Stand solidly by her side and coax and cajole her lovingly into dealing with situation, when the going gets tough. 4. Don’t relegate her into the background. Till yesterday, she was the Boss of the house. She called all the shots and was involved in everyone’s life in a place she called home. Gently restrict but don’t restrain. Disease or no disease, let her continue to be the Boss in the house 5. Don’t share this information with all and sundry. Not everyone is empathising with you and you certainly don’t want to surround yourself with people for whom your disease is a piece of news worthy of broadcast. Surround yourself with people who love you, stand by you and have only good things to share about the disease.

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